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Navigation menu Personal tools Not logged in Talk Contributions Create account Log in. Namespaces Article Talk. Much like the crazy fun times my buddies and I have when we get together each year.
If people reconnect and stay reconnected for many years , the relationship cannot sustain the excitement and specialness that is inherent when it is new and fresh.
That love they had as teenage sweethearts is not the same as the love that develops through building a life together and working through the challenges that life tends to dish out.
That teenage love was just the first stage of romantic love which either changes over time or it fades away and dies.
Therefore, comparing the immature, fairy-tale representation based on teenage love with real-life married love over a period of years is not reasonable.
It was just a stepping-stone to growing up and ultimately experiencing real love based on making a life together. The problem comes when they allow the memory of the past and the fantasy of a possible future to interfere on the present in such a way as to jeopardize the lives they have now.
From experience I know that a good marriage is a great blessing that is not to be taken lightly or put at risk because of such fantasies.
Before the affair it would never have occurred to me, now different story. Matter of fact I am now inspired to delete all the old High School girl friends from his account.
Act like a teenager, get treated like one! No one will leave a happy marriage, where they are truly in love with their spouse, for anyone.
Think about it. I say this as a person looking in from the other side of this whole crazy thing. I ,too, got in touch with an old flame, and the feelings were still there.
There is no person on earth who can tell you for sure if that theory is true or not. I have spent my life with a husband who has been emotionally abusive.
Guess what? To him I guess it has been. Maybe at some point these spouse just decided they had had enough and wanted out. Honey, Marriage is an illogical illusion created to make people monogamous.
If you stayed with an emotionally abuse spouse then you have been duped. Marriage sucks and monogamy is boring. What a small way of looking at a complex problem.
Emotional affairs are built on fantasy. Happiness, true happiness come from within, not another person. People look outside and themselves for quick fixes or an escape.
That could With alcohol, drugs, affairs, etc. The fantasy that the high school sweetheart is your soulmate is just that, a fantasy.
That is also the exact same thing I did, with the permission of my husband because I discovered his 3-month chat affair with his first GF in HS after their HS reunion last year.
I have the full transcript of their exchanges and cyber sex and I threatened the girl to send it to her relatives and HS batchmates. I did the same to my husband.
The bitch deactivated her FB account. The bitch who came from a broken-dysfunctional family with 2 children out of wedlock attempted suicide.
My husband was so remorseful and promised never ever to do it again. Now, he is at my beck and call. BTW, I am my H high school sweetheart!
I have found that talking about our early young love brings us closer together. We reminisce about how we were so excited to see and be with each other at that time.
I think it makes us remember our deep love and feelings for each other before all details of life came about. Or risk someone who liked him in HS striking up that kind of suggestive conversation with him.
He hooked up with his ex girlfriend. He describes her as a love like no other. She said she should never have given him up, and he agreed.
Who could ever comptete with that? Sounds familiar. Two years, as of next week since I found out the first time.
I am practical. I told him to go and try life with her. Just know I will not allow our kids to meet her during that time.
My girls 13 and 10 are still traumatized over this. Mine just did that after 35 years if marriage. She contacted him and sent him pictures of them she kept feom when they were young, copies of 30 pics, even writing on air mail paper like when he was overseas in school, flashing back to the past, always focusing on their lust driven highly sexual past, even talking of his male organ with an affectionate pet name.
She dumped him 40 years ago, not wanting to wait, and saw him several years later and looked the other way. Now 40 years later she stalks him she is married and lies, telling him she is abused by an alcoholic husband.
She is the alcoholic My husband became her submissive. He said he could never say no to her back then or now.
This woman is in need of some retirment funds since she has none and sees a successful doctor who she now wants. I saw his love letters to her before and after their physical affair…no remorse, just planning the next outing.
He even gave her a cherished item our son made for Us…because she asked for it! Now that I caught him, he wants me back…when he wrote her that she was the only love for him, past, present and future, the best person in the world, the smartest, most intelligent redundant most caring she really did not care…just complained about her life and best lovemaker…he said she was good at blow jobs…but she said he was her first…at 20 years of age!
She always lied, but he was blind. He said she had him for life plus one. He lied about going to a conference…he went and she met him on the plane there and back and stayed every single day.
They texted constantly, with penile emojis, etc. She found him just after he completed radiation for prostate cancer…and is on female hoemines to suppress testosterone, making him very emotional and shrinking all male parts to child size…and not working like before.
She promised therapy of his body part…and she did, and she told him he would never be happy with me…that he settled! We were happy, but she was his first true love and controlled him…and he did anything for her.
Now he wants me back…and I shudder. I found the pictures and some email…and he seemed to day he onky married memtomhave children. I am heartbroken. I am married to a beta male and I am a natural nurturer and submissive.
Now he may even have STDs. I found out she cheated many times, and a few years ago with an ex con who tried to kill his own wife..
Why now? I thought my husband loved me. I even saved his life, insisting he be checked for his prostate when he denied a problem and we caught the aggressive tumor just in time.
Trust is gone. Lies came so easily. Now he is remorseful…but he told her their days together were heaven on earth, that she was never going to be out of his life, that the red seas parted when his eyes met hers…that he would always think of her first, etc.
Good grief, these Css — they really live in la-la land. When I think about my high school boyfriends, I just cringe — we are sooooo different now; it would never have worked out in reality.
Which is exactly where most CSs do not live: Realityville. Carol, You made me laugh!! High school boyfriend ewww. My h was 20 when he was with this thing.
He started up with her when he turned In 4 Schritten zum perfekten Online-Date. So fragst du richtig bei deinem Anbieter nach.
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